Friday, June 3, 2016

Oops!

From recent correspondence

Edited by Morris Dean

We named our lock company “SURE-LOCK” so that any houses using our products could be called “SURE-LOCK HOMES.”
    One thing is certain:
Although things aren’t
as they should be,
they definitely are as they are.
    Did you hear about the Vampire Doctor? To repel him, you hold not a cross but an apple in front of him every day.


Good Morning,
    Just hoping this email reaches you fast, I’m sorry for this emergency and for not informing you about my urgent trip to Philippines but I just have to let you know my present situation. Everything was fine until I was robbed on my way back to the hotel, I wasn’t seriously hurt but I lost my money, wallet phone and everything i had with me. I immediately contacted my bank in order to block my cards and also made a report at the nearest police station. I’ve been to the embassy and they are helping me with my documentation so i can fly out but I’m urgently in need of some funds to pay for my hotel bills and my flight ticket home, I will definitely REFUND as soon as back home. It was a terrible experience to go through but looking on the bright side, I wasn’t seriously hurt or injured and I’m still alive which is the most important thing.
    Please kindly let me know if you would be able to help me out so I can forward you details on how to get funds to me. I will check my email every 30 minutes for your reply because it's the only way i can reach you.
    Thanks.
    [Editor’s Note: The email account of the friend from whom the above note appeared to come had been hacked, as she later explained: “I was hacked the usual boring way...asking for money to help on a trip I was not on.”
    I told her that the bogus email was new and sort of interesting, because I had received many emails seemingly from friends or acquaintances who had been hacked, but none had solicited money. They had almost always merely given a web link I was supposed to click on.
]


You are no doubt familiar with the term “Freudian slip.” What about “Trumpian slip”? That’s where you slip up and say something that’s true. Trevor Noah coined it on his Daily Show [“Trump Is a Yuge Hypocrite on Guns,” Marlow Stern, The Daily Beast, May 25]. Excerpt:
On December 16, 2012, following the horrific mass-shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School that claimed the lives of 26 innocent people – including 20 children between the ages of 6 and 7 – President Obama delivered a speech at a prayer vigil in Newtown, Connecticut....
    Donald Trump wrote the following the day after President Obama’s poignant Newtown speech: ”President Obama spoke for me and every American in his remarks in #Newtown Connecticut.”
    Furthermore, in his 2000 book, The America We Deserve, Trump wrote:

The Republicans walk the NRA line and refuse even limited restrictions... I generally oppose gun control, but I support the ban on assault weapons and I support a slightly longer waiting period to purchase a gun. With today’s Internet technology we should be able to tell within 72 hours if a potential gun owner has a record.
    Last week, Trump—now the presumptive Republican nominee for president – received the endorsement of the National Rifle Association and delivered a speech at the NRA’s national convention in Louisville, Kentucky. Joining fellow speaker Ted Nugent (really), Trump, whose hotels and clubs are gun-free zones, told the animated crowd that he wished to end gun-free zones—in a convention hall that was a gun-free zone. [read more]

“Shakespeare more popular abroad than in Britain, study finds” [Mark Brown, Guardian, April 18]. Excerpt:
Shakespeare is more popular and better understood in emerging economies such as Brazil, India, China, Mexico and Turkey than he is in the UK, a new report for the British Council suggests.
    A survey of 18,000 people in 15 countries reveals, for example, that 88% of surveyed Mexicans like Shakespeare, compared with only 59% of British people; 84% of Brazilians said they found him relevant to today’s world, compared with 57% in the UK; and 83% of Indians said they understood him, far more than the 58% of Britons. [read more]
It is as necessary for an ambitious French politician to write a book explaining why he never likes to think of politics as it is for an ambitious American politician to write a book explaining why he never things of anything else. [–Adam Gopnik, Paris to the Moon, 2000, p. 21]

A special crew for dealing with unexpected situations: They’re called the Contingency Contingent.
    If God had damned everything and everyone I asked him to, Hell would be very full by now.
    You can’t just take life or leave it – first you must take it, then you have to leave it.


Parc de Bagatelle in Bois de Boulogne, Paris

Grateful for correspondence, Morris Dean

1 comment:

  1. A friend emailed me that "In today’s blogpost, Sherlock would surely catch one detail [in the email hack item]: If one had indeed lost 'everything' (esp. phone), then it was quite unlikely the sender would have quick & easy access to the internet…to send such a note, much less 'check e-mail every 30 mins.'”
        Indeed! Good catch, Sherlock! The same impression had made me immediately suspicion that the email was bogus. My first step was to email my friend's adult son, who quickly let me know that she had already told him of the hacking, etc.

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