.jpg)
By Susan C. Price
[Questions are followed by answers and then, inevitably by ADVICE...you DID expect that...didn’t you?]
My husband looks at my best friend too often. Should I be jealous? –Penny
Nope. Jealousy is pretty dang useless.
Hubby comes home and stays with YOU, not with your best friend. You probably don’t notice/see when he looks at you. What’s “too often”?
Most men look... it doesn’t usually mean much about their actual state of attraction…let alone what they are doing, or going to do. As the conversation in “Plain and Fancy” (an old musical comedy) went:
(young thing…searching for a man to marry) “…at a party, he won’t notice, when the pretty girls arrive…”Suggestion, tell him that this is how you see it. See what he says.
(wise old woman) “You ever find a man like that, make sure he’s still alive!”
Is it that he seems to NOT be giving you enough attention? Ask yourself what’s really bugging you.
Perhaps there is some stuff you want him to do with you that you need to specifically ask for: “Honey, it would be nice if you could verbally positively comment, now and then, when I am wearing something new, or have a welcoming smile on my face.” (This assumes that you do have a welcoming smile...and that your spouse, like many men, is mostly un-self-aware....he needs specific directions to meet your needs. Just like, eating an artichoke or pleasing a woman…these are not as obvious as hammering in a nail. Yes, I am guilty of making assumptions. Live with it.)
[We would really like more questions to answer, so send ’em in….]
_______________
Copyright © 2013 by Susan C. Price
| Comment box is located below |
I find that there are two standards. One for men and one for women. My wife, daughter, mother, and any number of women, I know or have known; will watch one of these dancing, or singing shows on TV, and go on and on about how pretty, and what a beautiful figure one of the contestants has. I learned a long time ago---if they ask my opinion, "I lie".
ReplyDeleteAnytime a woman asks a man for his opinion, it is a trap. The answer about the hot chick on TV: "I guess she is alright." Anymore excitement in a man's voice than that and he is in trouble.
After seventy years I still don't understand women; I've just learned how to pick my way through the mine field.
Husbands eyeing other women? Go along with it. Point out pretty women. Nice figures, a good bust line. It will "deflate" his "balloon" and when a woman is not enraged, the practice will calm down. If a woman loves her man and has confidence, their relationship should not be destroyed by his looking. He's not dead, just married! Beauty is still beauty. Now, if the man is looking at elderly, overweight women, have his eyes checked and tell him not to embaress you by looking at non-attractive women!
ReplyDeleteI would suggest that she address her issues with his eyeing other women. Maybe there is something about herself she does not like. Confidence is contagious. Eyeing a member of the opposite sex is very normal.
ReplyDeleteI believe it depends on how the "eyeing" is presented...if it is while a mate is trying to communicate with the person they are with, I would think it is rude and unacceptable. Also if the "eyeing" were done in a way which may be perceived as inappropriate..full out taking in the WHOLE picture...it would not be acceptable. There are a lot of factors that change the situation! Glancing at a pretty face is quite natural, there is no harm....as long as it is odne discreetly...drooling or ogling is another story folks!
ReplyDeleteDrooling...is messy and can ruin the silk.
ReplyDelete