Goines On: †hank you Jesus

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Whenever Goines passed the “†hank you Jesus” sign in the front yard of his friend and neighbor who was an ordained Christian minister, he checked whether someone in the family had cleaned it yet. So far, over many months – maybe more than a year – they hadn’t done so. The accumulated dirt and grime on the sign had become as noticeable as the words beneath it, and Goines had often itched to bring some Clorox wipes on his walk to clean the sign, or just come back after a walk especially for the purpose. It would be easy to do, wouldn’t take a minute. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t done it. Maybe because it would be trespassing, even if he was “doing them a favor.” Maybe they wanted the sign to be dirty?

    Goines decided he should seek permission first. And why not have a little fun at the same time? He emailed his friend a limerick:

My neighbor pastor’s †hank you Jesus sign
in grime reminds us Jesus sees us shine
    even when we’re landed thud
    in the deepest thickest mud,
To clean your sign for you would please us fine!

    To emphasize the final line, Goines even said in the email that he would be honored to clean the sign. A couple of weeks passed without a reply – or any evidence of the sign’s having been cleaned. The absence of cars on the driveway might signal they were away. School was out, so they might be on vacation.
    Goines used the time to fiddle with his limerick:

Layers of grime on the “†hank you Jesus”
remind believers that Jesus sees us,
    even when we’re landed thud
    in the deepest, thickest mud,
and they think such dirty signs should please us.

    Goines really had to find out where his friend stood on the question. They seemed to be back from vacation now, so he emailed again.
    Voilà! That did the trick, but his friend’s response surprised Goines – by the “pastor’s persona” in which he wrote. He said he was “super excited” that Jesus still lives (in all-caps). He said the sign couldn’t be cleaned, it had weathered too much from all the years, and he was going to purchase a new one – would purchase two and give one to Goines to help spread the word (in all-caps). He did allow, though, that he would do so only with Goines’ permission.
    Goines withheld permission, with thanks, but challenged the pastor on the sign’s uncleanability, suggesting that Clorox wipes might do the trick, if he were permitted to try that.
    But the next day the sign was gone, and now had been gone for more than two weeks, a blank slate for Goines to scribble on:

The pastor’s neighbors wondered at no sign,
did its absence announce he’d gone offline?
    After allowing all that grit,
    had he fin’ly gone back-slid,
that front yard spot no longer Jesus’ shrine?

Copyright © 2019 by Moristotle