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Mrs. Goines must have been observing him, because she said, “Me, too, I would like to have another cup, but we shouldn’t. You’ll just have to savor the one you had.”
“Savor it? But how – it’s gone?”
“Savor its memory.”
Later, Goines returned to what his wife had said. Could a person really savor memories? Memories were for Goines more reminders of loss than lingering presences to be enjoyed again.
But could that be because of Goines’ tendency to feel the past more as sadness over loss than as gladness over having had?
He admitted to himself now that he often did recall past events with a sense of being there again, feeling anew the predominant feelings of the time – savoring them.
The key, he realized, was that the events he could remember in that savory way had been sharply attended; he had savored them at the time.
He had drunk his coffee this morning without attending to it; he had been lost in other thoughts. When he picked up his empty cup, it was too late to savor it, either in the drinking or the remembering. In fact, he couldn’t remember it, because he hadn’t been fully there while drinking it.
He would have to try to remember another morning’s coffee. Maybe a morning in Paris when the Goineses were there for their 50th....
“Thank you, dear Mrs. Goines!” he said to himself. And he turned to the day’s Wordle in the NY Times, which he intended to savor 100%.
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Be here now. It's hard to do but I try.
ReplyDeleteMorris, I love how your reflections that come about from your everyday activities elicit much wisdom. I have enjoyed your "Goines On" posts so much. This one is wonderful, as it reminds us to savor the moments of life's everyday wonders. From my personal experience, memories have often been lingering presences to be enjoyed again, and not just the ones that are reminders of loss (and sometimes, they are both!). I once heard a quote that said something like, "a good memory is a feeling/scene/ that you can visit over and over again." It doesn't quite work that way, sadly, for in reality, memories can fade or be modified over time. However, I do find that some of them have remained clear, fresh, and seemingly intact, and I think the spirit of the quote is valid and full of potential - that we can relive some of the warmth, comfort, or inspiration that comes from revisiting a good memory.
ReplyDeleteYou have presented a realization that I hadn't considered directly before: that in order to be able to savor good memories, one may need to be savoring them in the moment they happen. Very good observation!
Sometimes when I've revisited a place from my childhood, or met someone again after years, I find that my memory of the place or the personality of the "someone" is quite different from what I am now experiencing on the second encounter, but other times, it's very close. That partly has to do with the mind of a child vs. that of an adult, but also, things change over time. It's always delightful when the memory closely matches encountering the reality again.
André, speak of experiences to savor – reading your comment is one of the best kind there is! Goines’ shirt buttons popped right off, he was so elated. I am considering excerpting a sentence from your comment to use as another testimonial for Moristotle & Co.’s Editor in Chief….
DeleteHow would this wording for YOUR testimonial suit you?
DeleteI love how Goines’ reflections about everyday activities often lead to wise understandings of life.
This morning, that putative endorsement seems overwrought. Forgive me my impudence; I must have been being influenced by the sound of those buttons popping off Goines’ shirt.
DeleteA corollary insight struck Goines as he was walking effortlessly – and unawares of the walking – to do a chore: he could walk fine – or fine enough. It was only when he concentrated on the walking, noting his pains, his waddles, that he seemed decrepit and barely able to manage it. Such walking, deeply unsavorable, ought not to be attended to. Just get on with what you are doing.
ReplyDeleteGoines’ thought he might actually have a guardian angel; just as I was writing that “corollary insight” comment, Mrs. Goines read to him from a NYTimes article about the actor Mark Rylance, who told an interviewer, “Sometimes during rehearsals, I experienced feelings of resistance and doubt in myself.”
DeleteThe interviewer asked him, “What got you past those feelings?”
Rylance replied: “Coming to my senses. I mean that literally: Stop thinking and smell the air. Taste whatever you’re tasting. Listen and look at the other actors. It immediately moves you into something much larger than your own fears or expectations. Doing long runs of plays, you can get into a rut of self-consciousness, and it feels like you’re in some kind of prison yard. But actually, when you come to your senses, the prison yard is open to the sky.”