Goines On: “Merry Christmas!”

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As the Christmas cards arrived in the Goineses’ mailbox – some of them holding back from “Merry Christmas!” with “Season’s Greetings!” – Goines remembered something he had read the day before:

The Christmas holidays (including New Year’s Day) are sad for reminding us of losses. Our parents are dead, some of our siblings, a number of friends. We can’t quite get back into the child’s belief in Santa Claus.

    Innocent wishes of “Merry Christmas!” also came via animated Jacquie Lawson and email – like the reply from the saleslady to whom he had emailed a question. How had Goines had the gall to reply something on the order of:

I have no expectation of Christmas merriment, nor do I wish for it, it seems so fake and desperate. But, if Christmas is important to you (perhaps religiously?), may this one be really, really good!”

    Why was Goines so angry?

    Anyway, he relaxed by remembering his favorite card by far, with two cartoon animals on the outside labeled “EPHANT” and “CAM,” with “NO EL! NO EL!” on the inside.

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