Thor's Day: If you're out there somewhere

Happy birthday, Mary Alice Condley

By Morris Dean

Today is my sister Mary Alice Condley's birthday. She would have been 89 (1925-2007). I am confident that almost everyone who knew Mary would agree with our sister Patsy's estimation of her as "the sweetest, kindest, most caring person [they] have ever known."
    Why write about Mary's birthday in a "Thor's Day" column? Simply because religion was central to Mary's life. She truly believed that she communed with Jesus.
    Her daughter Karen remembers an incident that

happened about four days before Mother died and I will never forget and felt so blessed to witness it. Mom had been told she was going to die in less than two weeks, she seemed to accept it very peaceably. When I walked in her hospital room she had her eyes shut, and was praying out loud saying, thank you Jesus, over and over. It was not a usual thing to see Mama showing such emotion so I knew she was really having a good experience with the Lord! It sure blessed me!

    In a similar vein, our cousin Vernon DeWayne Voss tells me about the final hours of his father, our Uncle Vernon, who played an influential role in our lives in California:

When my dad passed away from cancer in October 1992, I had sat up all night with him in the hospital the night before he died. That morning [my wife] and our youngest son relieved me so I could get some sleep.
    All of a sudden [while I was out sleeping] my dad rose up out of the bed and stated, "It's so pretty!"
    [My wife] said, "What do you see, Dad?"
    Dad answered, "I see the Lord and everything."
    Dad then said, "I have to kiss you good-bye." Which he did.
    Those were the last audible words spoken by Dad. My dad would not have said what he said unless it was true.
    You, myself, and all of our remaining relatives will stand before God one day. And every knee shall bow before him.

I come from a large family of many such believers, which is no doubt a main reason that religion – for and against – has played a pivotal role in my own life. Patsy bears witness to Mary's having been "very religious," but notes that she "couldn't stand crowds so didn't go to church in her later life. She helped me with answers when I needed reassurance." Patsy adds that our sister Flo Elowee Story "has the same problem as Mary's. Doesn't go to church cause she can't stand crowds. They both attended church when younger."
    Same as for Mary, I think that almost everyone who knew Vernon would consider him, too, one of the sweetest, kindest, most caring persons they ever knew. I certainly do. Mary's husband, Elbert Condley, who died not many months after Mary, also visited Vernon in the hospital during those final days in October 1992. Elbert talked movingly about the visit, deeply affected by Vernon's cheerfulness and attentiveness to others even as death approached. If Elbert and Mary had still attended church and it anointed saints, I think Elbert would have nominated Vernon for sainthood.
    Many believers have such experiences, and they feel blessed to have them. As our nephew, our departed sister Anna Jeanette Avey's son, novelist Steve Glossin, has observed, people can believe what they want to believe if it comforts them and makes them feel good [and it doesn't hurt others].

[L-R] Anna, Flo, Morris, Patsy, and Mary in the Kings River, July 28, 1951

If Mary is, contrary to what I myself believe, out there somewhere today, listening in, I'd like to say this to her:

I'm thinking of you, Mary. I love you, and I know that you loved me. We always did, and I continue to love you. (And the same for you, Anna.)

[We have been running "Tuesday Voice" pieces of Mary's paintings, "Posthumously Speaking," with columns featuring paintings in the possession of Patsy Ruth Garza and Karen Abbey scheduled to appear soon.]

Copyright © 2014 by Morris Dean