Fish for Friday

Nanosecond photograph

Edited by Morris Dean

[Anonymous selections from recent correspondence]

You will like this snippet, Morris, from the June 14 NY Times Book Review section, "By the Book," featuring Judd Apatow, and you will wickedly choose to include it as a fish next Friday. Apatow is asked several questions about books, including this question: "Disappointing, overrated, just not good: What book did you feel you were supposed to like, and didn't?"

The Bible. It's just not working for me. I wish it was. Wouldn't it be great if it did work for me and I had the peace one gets when knowing the universe is just and kind and guided by eternal intelligence? Maybe I'm reading it wrong. I am more of a Why Good People Do Bad Things, by James Hollis, kind of guy.

Incredibly bad day?

Well, Google meant well. And they sincerely apologized. "Google App Mislabels Black People as ‘Gorillas’." [Conor Dougherty, NY Times]. Excerpt:

From self-driving cars to photos, Google, like every technology company, is constantly releasing cutting-edge technologies with the understanding that problems will arise and that it will have to fix them as it goes. The idea is that you never know what problems might arise until you get the technologies in the hands of real-world users.
    In the case of the Google Photos app — which uses a combination of advanced computer vision and machine learning techniques to help users collect, search and categorize photos — errors are easy to spot. When the app was unveiled at the company’s annual developer show, executives went through carefully staged demonstrations to show how it can recognize landmarks like the Eiffel Tower and give users the ability to search their photos for people, places or things — even things as specific as a particular dog breed.
    Of course, in practice, it is much messier. Google Photos mistakes dogs for horses and clocks for hubcaps. In my Google Photos, a picture of a friend’s bloody elbow, injured while skateboarding, was labeled “food.”
    But some mistakes are bigger than others, and on Sunday a Brooklyn software developer named Jacky Alciné, who is black, used Twitter to post an image that showed his Google Photos app had labeled a picture of Mr. Alciné and a friend as “gorillas.” In an interview, he said he figured posting on Twitter would lead to a much quicker fix.
    “Using a livestream (like Twitter) as opposed to waiting for a response is a lot more efficient,” he said.
    [It was.] ...Within an hour and a half, a Google engineer named Yonatan Zunger, whose title is chief architect in the Google Plus social network, responded to his post, and promised swift action.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

I just now finished reading “Gone to meet Jesus.” I also viewed all of the cartoons. Exceptional presentation, very heartfelt and moving. You did good. I am moved at the true spirit and beliefs of Vern. Gives me a better understanding of my Tulare relatives and how they were steadfast in their beliefs. With age, we are exposed to many differences: morality, religion, spirituality – they vary according to exposure. With one of the oncologists I worked with, needless to say dealing with death was the reality. One of the patients I admired was a kind, gentle man with no support system. I was glad he passed through my collected experiences, as did many others. We all deal with death and the question whether there is a hereafter, but none of us will know the true outcome until about the last five breathes after the heart ceases to beat. The irony is there is no feedback from the deceased, leaving us to justify our original belief system in some other way.
    I think when we lose family or friends or people we admire, the sadness is, we no longer have physical access to them. However, the memories of our exposure, good or bad, will remain.
    I am not afraid to die, and I do realize and accept that I am in the later stage of life in this theater. I have no idea whether there is another stage we progress to, but I will do my best to let you know if I die before you.

BP has reached an $18.7-billion settlement with the U.S. government and four state governments that would resolve years of litigation over the 2010 oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. ["BP reaches $18.7-billion agreement to settle Gulf of Mexico oil spill." (Ryan Parker & Michael Muskal, LA Times)]
    The agreement covers claims from Florida, Alabama, Mississippi, and Louisiana as well as federal claims in connection with the spill, officials said.

In a global settlement, BP has agreed to pay $18.7 billion to cover environmental and economic damages in the five Gulf states.
    I have been working on the ground in the Gulf with Ocean Conservancy ever since the disaster began, and I have to tell you how important this news is to the future of the Gulf of Mexico and the people and wildlife that depend on it....
    This is a momentous day, but in many ways, this is just the beginning of the Gulf’s long road to recovery. We must make sure that this settlement funding is not wasted on any projects that don’t restore the vital natural resources of the Gulf that our wildlife and coastal communities depend on. For wildlife like sperm whales or bluefin tuna, it can take decades to understand the full impact of the BP oil disaster. It’s up to us to make sure that the money from this settlement is used to restore the areas where the BP oil disaster happened – the waters of the Gulf of Mexico itself.
    Take Action: Tell the Restore Council to ensure these funds are spent on science-based restoration projects.

Four brothers, Milton, Michael, Marvin, & Melvin, went to college and became successful doctors and lawyers. One evening, when they got together for dinner, they discussed their 95th-birthday gifts for their mother, who had moved to Florida.
    Milton said, "I had a big house built for Mama."
    Michael said, "I had a large theater built in the house."
    Marvin said, "I had my Mercedes dealer deliver an SL600 to her."
    Melvin said, "You know how Mama loved reading the Bible but she can't read anymore because of her poor eyesight? Well, I met this preacher who told me about a parrot who could recite the entire Bible. It took ten preachers almost eight years to teach him. To acquire the parrot for Mama, I had to pledge $50,000 a year to their church for five years, but it was worth it. Mama only has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot will recite it."
    The other brothers were impressed.
    After the celebration, Mama sent out her thank-you notes.
    "Milton, the house you built is so huge that I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house. Thanks anyway."
    "Marvin, I am too old to travel. I stay home and have my groceries delivered, so I never use the Mercedes. The thought was good. Thanks."
    "Michael, you gave me an expensive theater with Dolby sound, and it can hold 50 people, but all of my friends are dead, I've lost my hearing, and I'm nearly blind. I'll never use it. Thank you for the gesture just the same."
    "Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to give a little thought to your gift. The chicken was delicious. Thank you so much."

GREAT news for the Great Barrier Reef! I heard from my colleagues in Australia that the UNESCO World Heritage Committee put pressure on Australia to deliver on its promise to restore the health of the Great Barrier Reef.
    More than 500,000 WWF Activists called on world leaders to defend our shared natural heritage. Now an end to Great Barrier Reef dumping is imminent.
    ["An End to Great Barrier Reef Dumping Is Imminent" (World Wildlife Federation)]

War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

If you were to spell out the counting numbers [in English], how far would you have to count until you would find the letter "a"?
    One thousand.

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

China - The spiral staircase

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

Limerick of the week:

Benjamin didn't mind that bit of verse,
so now he's gone and baked me something worse:
    Pain au Chocolat! It's scrumptious,
    it helps me feel rambunctious.
Wife thinks if I have two I'll need a nurse.

[Actually, when we went to The French Corner Bakery on Wednesday, I had a scrumptious little coconut pie. The verse above, unlike last week's, is purely imaginary, suggested by the latest photograph on Chef Benjamin's Facebook page at the time I put this column together.]

Copyright © 2015 by Morris Dean