[continued from yesterday]
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It was 2 a.m. by the time I finished writing my speech for the 60th annual convention of the Network for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. I went to bed and fell asleep practicing it in my imagination:
Good morning, fellow animal lovers. We are gathered here, two thousand strong, to celebrate our heritage of preventing cruelty to animals. And there's a lot of it about these days. Three Americans out of five own at least one pet....
The next morning, my eyes adjusting to the lights, I began to make out the hundreds of tables in the huge ballroom, with all those members of the NPCA. And on the wall across the banquet hall, I could now see a huge banner.
The chairman was at the microphone, introducing me, explaining how I was filling in for the announced speaker.
"But Morris Dean is a Toastmaster!" he exclaimed with admiration. "And he had time to prepare—all night!"
Modest laughter greeted this announcement. But I wasn't able to enjoy the humor, for I had just comprehended the huge banner across the banquet hall. I was about to address the 60th Annual Convention of the National Pest Control Association.
My prepared speech had suddenly become a "table topic," which Toastmasters clubs use for short improptu speaking.
The chairman was saying, "Mr. Dean will speak on—" He looked up from the introduction I had given him and turned to look at me incredulously. "On what? 'The Appreciation of Pets'?"
A swarm of butterflies invaded my chest.
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[concluded tomorrow]
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Good morning, fellow animal lovers. We are gathered here, two thousand strong, to celebrate our heritage of preventing cruelty to animals. And there's a lot of it about these days. Three Americans out of five own at least one pet....
The next morning, my eyes adjusting to the lights, I began to make out the hundreds of tables in the huge ballroom, with all those members of the NPCA. And on the wall across the banquet hall, I could now see a huge banner.
The chairman was at the microphone, introducing me, explaining how I was filling in for the announced speaker.
"But Morris Dean is a Toastmaster!" he exclaimed with admiration. "And he had time to prepare—all night!"
Modest laughter greeted this announcement. But I wasn't able to enjoy the humor, for I had just comprehended the huge banner across the banquet hall. I was about to address the 60th Annual Convention of the National Pest Control Association.
My prepared speech had suddenly become a "table topic," which Toastmasters clubs use for short improptu speaking.
The chairman was saying, "Mr. Dean will speak on—" He looked up from the introduction I had given him and turned to look at me incredulously. "On what? 'The Appreciation of Pets'?"
A swarm of butterflies invaded my chest.
_______________
[concluded tomorrow]
I love a good serial.
ReplyDeleteSteve, I especially hope that you will enjoy tomorrow's conclusion, not included in either the speech for the Toastmasters Tall Tales Contest or the article published in the Chapel Hill Herald.
Delete