The animal lovers convention

In 1993, soon after I joined Toastmasters, my wife and I drove up to Washington for the Fortune Tellers Bazaar. I was excited about the bazaar, because Madame Sophie had prophesied, "In Vashington, you vill be crowned with a unique honor."
    The hotel hosting the bazaar also had the 60th annual convention of the NPCA. "That's the Network for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals," my wife said.
    "I know that," I said.
    That evening we had dinner in the hotel restaurant. As we were being seated, I noticed a distraught-looking man at the next table, and I heard him say, "I just don't know what I'm going to do."
    While we were waiting for our entree, I noticed that the man was staring at my lapel. The next thing I knew, he was fingering it, and rubbing my Toastmasters pin.
    "Boy, am I glad to see you," he said.
    He said he was the chairman of the NPCA convention, and the speaker for next morning had fallen ill.
    "Would you fill in?" he said.
    Frankly, I couldn't imagine filling in on such short notice, but he insisted. The way he put it, I'd be dishonoring all Toastmasters everywhere if I refused.
    "You have all night to prepare a fifteen-minute speech," he said. "And you'll have plenty of time to attend the Fortune Tellers Bazaar."
    "But—"
    "And because of the short notice, I'll pay you twice what I was going to pay the other guy. Two thousand bucks!"
    My wife kicked me in the shin and her look said, "Ask for more!"
    "All right," I said, "I'll do it for three thousand."
    "You're on!" the chairman said, with an expression that might have meant I could have gotten four.
    Back in our room, my wife said, "Isn't it strange that this NPCA group doesn't have a few Toastmasters?"
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[continued tomorrow]