By Paul Clark (aka motomynd)
When you are 65, you are finally able to understand why Ernest Hemingway shot himself at age 62, and you are ever more amazed that Hunter Thompson managed to wait until he was 67 to do the same.
When you are 65, and you take your six-year-old son to the playground, you finally get used to young women saying, “Your grandson looks exactly like you!” And you learn to savor their reactions when you say, “Well, that’s good news, because he is actually my son.”
When you are 65, and young women react in mock horror and say things like, “Oh my god! How is that possible?” when they learn the six-year-old you have in tow is your son, you can actually get away with saying things like, “Well, it is sort of hard to explain, but if you have an hour, I can show you.”
When you are 65, and you say untoward things to young women, some will blush and turn away, some will say things like, “Yeah right, my husband is half your age and he can’t give me an hour,” but the 20-something that is your favorite of all the playground moms, who has the six-year-old daughter who is your son’s favorite of all the playground kids, might just say, “I have all afternoon. And my baby sister is visiting, so she can watch the kids.”
When you are 65, and you bring your son home from the playground three hours later than expected, your wife, who is well practiced at not noticing if you and her son are missing for hours, will feign concern and say, “What on earth have you two been up to? Have you been misbehaving?”
When you are 65, and your wife asks a probing question, you can look her in the eye and calmly say: “Remember that crazy 20-something mom we met at the playground, with the old VW bus she and her daughter painted by hand? Well, our big guy was playing so well with her daughter, we went over to her place, and she and I had sex for a couple of hours while her younger sister watched the kids.”
When you are 65, and you say something that might have been a problem in years past, your wife will laugh and say, “You so wasted your talent being a serious writer. How did you not wind up working for SNL? I can’t believe you came up with something that crazy, that fast. So, big guy was having a great time and didn’t want to leave, huh?”
When you are 65, you sometimes wish you could be taken a bit more seriously, but you have mostly learned when to step back from the edge. Instead of pushing your luck, you know when to say, “Yeah, something like that.”
When you are 65, good days still have moments that make you glad you outlasted Hemingway. On bad days, however, the idea of making it to 67 still seems a long way to go.
| Copyright © 2020 by Paul Clark |
Being 77, when I never thought I'd see 50, I still would never get away with a story like that...true or not. If I spend to much time talking with any woman, I'm in trouble. But in a way it is nice to know after all these years she is still jealous.
ReplyDeleteAs usual, Ed, you are the more courageous man. On my personal risk scale, I rank jealous women almost on the same level as moose. I can't imagine a long-term relationship with a jealous woman; I think the longest I ever lasted was four days, and that was only because we were in Hawaii. That "relationship" came to a resounding thud of an ending when she punched out a waitress she thought was leaning a bit too low over the table and being perhaps too friendly, thus igniting one of the more memorable bar brawls I've personally witnessed.
DeleteGreat story, Paul, but I'm nostalgic for 65. That was the good old days. How about making it to 78 and you can barely get to the end of the driveway? Enjoy it, pal.
ReplyDeleteNeil
Neil, if age 65 is the good old days, I have even more respect for people who tough it out beyond 70. I spent most of my life on course for some sort of dramatic death somewhere overseas, and I probably would have achieved that by age 50--if my wife hadn't shown up when she did and talked me into a relationship. Likewise, if we hadn't decided to have a child when I was 58, I doubt I would have seen 60. Now that I am 65, the part I still don't understand is why people are so much more afraid of death when older, than when younger: get whacked in your teens or 20s, and you lose a potentially vibrant half century or more; die in your 60s or 70s, and you lose one useful decade, or maybe two if you are exceptionally lucky? Old age seems the time to start racing cars--or motorcycles--or taking up skydiving, because if you have already beaten the odds and lived long, there is much less to lose. Plus, going out in spectacular fashion leaves the family a great story and makes it more likely we will be talked about forever.
ReplyDeletePaul,
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't presume to speak for anyone else on this subject. Nortin is in very good physical condition. That's what it's all about at our age. It's not fear of dying, it's fear of feebleness and incapacity and the actual experience of that every day which is hard. It's hard for me to drive slowly and keep the car on the road, never mind a motorcycle. It's surprising frankly, to not be able to get up off the floor. But whether at 78 or 87, it happens.
Neil
I agree with Neil.
DeleteJim
Neil, your “fear of feebleness and incapacity” is too narrowly focused. Both are conditioned by the content and context of the tasks we confront during our life course. Yes there are octogenarians who run marathons but they are abnormal. Most of us pick and choose based on physical and mental capacity for as long as we’re able. That’s resilience. I announced to the grandkids that I do not play games on the floor years ago; I have no trouble getting on the floor but getting back up ain’t pretty.
DeleteAll this occurred to me, wearing my rheumatology and gerontology hats years ago. It also occurred to me that architecture and design were critical to task “content and context” as we age. In 1985 Dennis Gillings And I published “Arthritis and Society ” which set this principle forth; it is a notion that has made a great difference in some European countries but the US lags. Our expensive toilettes, sofas, chairs, stairs, household implements, automobiles etc should not be considered sleek and trendy. They should be considered unconscionable barriers to resilience.
So Neil, want a cause? You write beautifully. Go for it!
Nortin,
DeleteYou are totally right about furniture and architecture. It's really clear that seating standards, toilets, etc. should be 3 or 4" higher. No toilet, tub or shower should lack something to grab, even if it looks like a towel bar. All stairs should have 2 handrails, not 1. Slightly shallower stairs with wider treads make a big difference. Even 2 or 3 steps need a handrail if your balance is poor. All of this would be helpful to anyone with knee or leg injuries.
It's hard for anyone to appreciate all this until you're personally challenged. All the accessibility standards focus on wheel chair access, not everyday feebleness and poor balance.
Not really complicated, just not acknowledged.
Neil
Those of us who take care of people challenged by musculoskeletal and neurological impairments are aware of all this. It has been a central focus of my career, and central to my teachings. Starting in the 1990s, notions of “disability” became politicized and entrepreneurial, as had all aspects of “health and healthcare.” In our country, “caring” had to be profitable, or at least have an impressive ROI, to be interesting to many of my audiences. Today, we’re taking this to extremes.
DeleteEurope was infected with this American meme but has never been able to fully invest in it. When we published Arthritis and Society, we had a large European response. The publisher, Butterworth, was British and very excited about this book and several others I wrote for them on other topics in the 1980s. The Swiss were invested in enhancing resilience (but this was before they invented coronary artery stenting). They had published Helfsmittal, a tome that catalogued assistive devices and design modifications. We never did anything like this. By the way, my co-author on Arthritis and Society, Dennis Gillings, was a close colleague at UNC with an east London working class background and a mother severely compromised by emphysema. We published a number of influential papers together. But by 1990, Dennis had created Quintiles, left academe, and ascended to the mainstream of American billionaires.
Where are you, Auguste Comte, when we need you?
So, Neil, write about it.
Nortin
Nortin,
DeleteIf the powers that be didn't listen to Dr. Hadler in the 80s, why would anyone listen to an old architect now? I'm weary of quixotic causes. Not sure where I would even take it. Who cares?
Neil
Start with an Op-Ed in the Philadelphia Enquirer and an Editorial in Architectural Digest and….
DeleteOh to be 50 again!I was in as good a shape as I ever was, even buffed up pretty nice from the gym, until arthritis destroyed by ability to do much of anything. In the intervening 15 years I have become the next thing to a cripple, 2 new knees, a bunyonectomy, constant pain and getting off the floor? Forget it, I need 15 minutes and 2 boys to help. The consolations, such as being able to get away with making suggestive remarks to young women, hardly seem worth the trade off. I have a standard joke with one young lady at the store of ample if pleasing proportions, that whenever she needs a "sugar daddy" she can call on me. She knows she is indulging the old fart, and she knows I know she knows. But, knowing many guys my age who are now pushing up daisies, I guess I'll take whatever's onmy plate.
ReplyDeleteOne of the most wonderfully intriguing aspects of publishing on Moristotle is you never know which direction the comments may go. When comments on my "Moose" series took a sharp turn into Civil War history, I was dismayed; as these comments have taken a turn into making life better for the aged, I am enthralled. Thanks guys!
ReplyDeleteThat said, I have one concern about all these great ideas about design changes. Americans seem to always want to take the easiest way out--choosing riding mowers for tiny yards, for example, instead of pushing a mower and getting some exercise--so if we make major design changes to enhance the lives of today's oldest generations, are we condemning younger generations to need the same features by the time they hit 60 years old, instead of 80? At what point do we make life so easy we end up with a generation of 40-somethings who can barely get off the floor without help?
Paul,
DeleteYou're right and of course maintaining fitness is a cautionary tale for your age and ours but arthritis and poor balance and avoiding falls are challenging regardless.
Neil
Getting into a comfortable position to enjoy sex is also a challenge, and perhaps more pertinent to Paul's fable's primary concern.
DeleteMoristotle, there is an uncomfortable position in which to enjoy sex? Interesting. Haven't come across that...yet.
DeleteNeil, lack of interest in maintaining fitness is, to me, one of the major threats for life in America as most of us have known it. While birth impairments, injuries and bad luck can force some people to need special design features to live their lives well, the main problem for most people is that they simply don't maintain even a base level of fitness.
Paul, you are lucky not yet to have come across any of the pains that can be felt in rolling, perching, launching, pivoting, or holding coital and other positions involved in this transcendent activity. Or maybe it’s your still young age....
DeleteMorris, unlike you, I'm not a child of the West Coast, so I've never been educated in Zen, yoga, tantra or any other of those creative aspects you West Coast folks possibly involve in your sex lives. Back here in the conservative East, we pretty much keep it simple and stay fully focused on the matter at hand, instead of adding complicated calisthenics. Sad to say, maybe a lack of creativity is why I've not yet found myself in an uncomfortable position during sex.
DeleteMotomynd, the pains I mentioned are about getting into even the most rudimentary of sexul positions, and have zero to do with any esoteric “Cali” sexual practices. Regardless of how young and vigorous my mind feels and thinks and behaves (and lusts), I have an old man’s body.
DeleteI totally agree with this well written piece. Take advantage when presented with a physical contact. I always told the truth and was met with yeah right. Sex is not a commentment, just pure pleasure! Jealous men are out.
ReplyDeleteSharon, what an interesting comment. Your attitude speaks for the changing mores as years have gone by. I was a teen in the 1960s and single through the early 1980s, and single again from the mid-1990s through early 2000s: the two eras were like different universes. In the second era I was in my 40s, and found it an incredible time: women of all ages had abandoned the need for seriousness and talk of long-term commitment in favor of honest and total commitment to the moment, the weekend, or whatever timeframe was at hand.
DeleteAt my usual risk of having someone put a contract out on me …….
ReplyDelete-When on trips in airports, on board cruise trips, etc, or waiting in line at WalMart, or in a mall, I play a personal game. How many fat people walk by before one that is not fat (“not fat” meaning they can see their feet while looking down over their stomach). We all know the answer to that question. It fits with the data that one third of American adults are overweight, and one third are obese. Also, as I learned the other day, 80% of black women are overweight or obese. Some years ago, someone coined the phrases “two seaters” and “three seaters”. You all have seen these people. The most obvious examples are in economy air travel, where two and three seaters hang over your arm and belt extensions are provided.
-Among people my age here, I am the only one (as one friend said to me) “with all my original parts”. Part of this is just good genes in my case, but there is also a very high correlation between people’s weight, diet, exercise over their lives, and the replacement of knees and other parts.
-Also I find that about a quarter of conversations linger on recent ailments. It seems that for those of us over 70 we now use a part of the brain on ailments that under age 20 was focused on sex. (Perhaps that is what it is —— we have 20% or so of the brian focused on sex, and then it switches in older years to something we can speak with authority about —— as opposed to fantasy.)
It is a peculiar contrast. Look at TV shows and find lead characters who are fat (Mike and Molly). Think about the percentage of clothing ads where the models are fat. How many news broadcasters have more than a modest stomach, if any? Then look at the NBC news talking to people on the street. It is as if there are two realities —— or one reality and one fantasy. And no one ever connects them.
I have been fortunate. I weigh what I weighed at graduation from college. When it went up 20 lbs in grad school, I pulled it backdown. I have been on a gym kick all my life (4-5 days a week, an hour each, jogging until no longer able, weights, cycles, leaving for work at 5AM to stop at the gym on my way, etc). I am no athlete —— flat feet, no jumping height, negative flotation, and clumsy. Just persistent. My “ailment” such as it is, is that I have lost 3 inches of height from the collapse of cushion in the lower spine.
All of which makes me wonder, not about us at our age, but about what the population will look like in 2050. Just as today’s 4 year olds are already fat, I wonder if by then being fat at age 4 will be celebrated, diet and exercise will be for the weird few (especially after age 30), and much of what we spend on healthcare and living will be to make all that seem OK. We have already reached the point where we are willing to give up on educating kids to insure school rooms have the “right portion” of “challenged” kids, and where driving ones wheel chair in the halls of a cruise ship is the accepted life style.
So in 2050 will it be routine that people in their 40s will need their own chairs? Fat kids will be seen as a disability, and thus be covered under legislation as a special set and be allocated a percent of college admissions? Will companies and government be required to provide ramps, special seats, etc. in offices and production lines? Etc.
Chip,
DeleteI share your concern. Weight has become very much a class and culture thing. Few of the wealthy summer people are overweight on the island. Some of the 'working class' islanders are, but not grotesque. They work too hard. The girl who delivered my 35 lb. carton of food was large but strong. Walked right up the steps carrying the box.
10 years ago I was spending some time in our NY office and I was impressed, walking cross town from Penn Station, how few overweight foks there were on the sidewalk and how fast they walked. Obviously an equation of some kind.
2050? Maybe there won't be enough food to be fat.
Neil
Neil and Chip,
DeleteAbout the problem of overweight: Yes, NYC is well known for its slim, fit population. Even the visiting crew from Prairie Home Companion was impressed---of course, Garrison Keillor noted, New Yorkers walk everywhere and wear black, so that makes them look even thinner!
Wealthier people have greater access to tennis and golf lessons, ballet classes, gym memberships, private pools and opportunities for just all-around activity. But today there are fewer sidewalks in suburban neighborhoods, unsafe ones in city neighborhoods, and poorly maintained parks and playgrounds for poorer neighborhoods, if they exist at all. Until the pandemic we saw very few bicycle riders, and bicycling is a way to get great execise cheaply. As a result, poorer people often have to look to family gatherings for safe, affordable and available activity, and that means many birthdays with potato salad and Aunt Minnie's famous cake.
Some anecdotal evidence: My affluent home town of Scarsdale, NY debated about building a pool as part of a high school addition while I lived there. It was voted down because as many noted, "we all belong to country clubs anyway." My parents, who did not belong to a club at that time, were very disappointed. (They did join later, to a family friendly club on Long Island Sound.) But for the families of more modest means, no swimmng lessons for them!
Anecdote #2: My good friend, the Black professional woman who lives in an affluent suburb of Raleigh, told me she was disappointed at the bond which passed in her town for more recreational facilities for kids. When I asked her why, she said, "The money all goes to soccer fields. Black kids don't play soccer."
Finally, I think I repeat myself by mentioning the three demographics which show such alarming obesity: elementary school teachers, low paid health workers, and policemen. Seriously??? These groups all know about nutrition, weight and good health; each group needs to be physically fit and to model good habits to their constituents, so why is this?
Cynthia
George, I have to say I agree with most of your comments. Genetics play a major role in creating star athletes, but staying fit and healthy is much more a matter of commitment and determination. Barring birth impairment or debilitating injury, just about anyone can stay fit if they choose, or they can become obese if they choose: but it is a choice, not a prison sentence of sorts handed down by our genes.
DeleteLike you, I have been fortunate and still have "all my original parts" at age 65. I also had the misfortune of almost dying at age 37 (from an allergic reaction to a medication) which took away my adventure-sports oriented career and left me a shell of what I used to be. I never rebuilt to the point of doing 100,000 pushups/year as I did before my health disaster, but I did get back to 50,000/year by age 44, and maintained that through age 64 (when a torn triceps ended the streak). I also never got back to running 10 miles in an hour at least once a week (not being a naturally gifted runner, the 6-minute mile was always my fitness barometer of sorts), but I did build up to doing trail "ultras" until my son was born when I was 59 and I had a sudden lack of training time. My point being, if someone who is not a natural athlete can maintain a high standard of fitness well into his 60s--after almost dying at age 37--what is going on with people who are sadly out of shape in their 20s, 30s, and 40s?
I think especially hard about your comments regarding present and future attitudes toward fitness as I consider my son, who is now six-years-old. He and I ran three miles together on Huntington Beach in California when he was two years and eight months old, and did it again on Huntington Beach in South Carolina a few months later. Today he thinks nothing of a hilly three-mile trail run and I am probably a year away from having to hire a younger runner to pace him as I can already barely keep up. In times past I probably would have been congratulated for encouraging his athleticism; today I am already harshly questioned by people who worry I am abusing him: even though he sets the pace and I never make him go further or faster than he wishes. Given the somewhat bleak future you bring into question, is my son likely to someday win acclaim for his fitness, or will he instead endure a lifetime of ridicule from people his age who won't even be able to run, much less dream of keeping up with him?
Paul,
DeleteOn the other side my observation is that far more people belong to fitness clubs and do fitness activities than 50 years ago. I don't remember anyone running like your son does when I was his age, yet the obese kid was a rarity and source of cruel amusement 70 years ago. You played sports, you didn't train for them.
Neil
Please tell Paul “wow.” His fitness is way beyond whatever mine was, and that is real discipline. I could not make one 6-minute mile, even falling off the tenth floor of a building.
DeleteWe are seeing a world in which people may exist comfortably without engaging in anywhere near as much physical activity as our ancestors once did. The result is an increase in obesity and problems connected with this. Many upper and middle class people have recognized this trend and have tried to contravene by conscious patterns of exercise and activity and by reducing caloric intake. So I don’t see people being mocked for being thin or for exercising or limiting their consumption of food. The problem is a societal or cultural one which goes to a point that Chip and Thia have both made. While I believe in national health care, it is not a panacea. Many health problems are the result of cultural or societal behavior patterns which if not changed will result in illness and early death regardless of the availability of medical care. One of the good things which we see with Medicare Advantage Plans is efforts to try to change unhealthy behavior, encouraging regular taking of prescription medication, prevention of complications of diabetes, etc. and encouragement of preventive care. Obviously, behavioral modification will not succeed in some cases, but it is a goal worth trying to achieve.
DeleteGeorge, as a teen I was small (5 foot 7 inches, 140 pounds), that and a knee injury knocked me out of most team sports. So I turned to individual sports: boxing, martial arts, and running--after my knee healed as much as it was ever going to at age 17. I never liked the confines of the boxing ring (too structured) so when I stumbled into the underground world of semi-professional bareknuckle fighting while in college, I took to it. In that endeavor you are in great shape or you get flailed (no referee, just buddies to hopefully intervene if things go badly) thus the inspiration for 100,000 pushups/year. I did those as a set of 500 on Monday and Wednesday, and on Friday a set of 500 in the morning and another in the evening. That many pushups, plus a five-mile daily jog and LOTS of speed bag and heavy bag work, established a base fitness level that I actually had to increase when I got into adventure sports in my mid 20s. I kept at that until I almost died at age 37--the elsewhere mentioned allergic reaction to an allergy medication, of all things. Seems like a bit much to people who have never trained seriously, I guess, but it was actually fairly milquetoast compared to some of the serious athletes I knew. I had some Navy SEAL buddies who would do my workout and then go do a two-mile ocean swim: now THAT'S extreme fitness.
ReplyDeletePaul,
DeleteYou are a rare bird. Bare knuckles fighting and 500 pushups a day. Amazing. I can't imagine.
Neil
Neil, not that rare, I fear my athletic achievements were child's play compared to real athletes. At my peak I was doing @ 2,000 pushups/week; when football legend Herschel Walker was in his prime, he did @ 20,000 pushups/week--plus 20,000 sit-ups, 10,000 pull-ups, plus running five miles/day. I've done upwards of three million pushups in my lifetime; Walker is probably closer to 30 million.
DeleteAs for bare knuckle fighting: It is overall probably safer than boxing. Most people don't know that boxers don't wear gloves to protect the other boxer's head, but rather to protect the hands so they could hit the other boxer in the head. Take away the gloves, and boxing's sordid history of traumatic head injuries and aging "punch drunk" former fighters probably never happens. That said, being slammed to the pavement in a dimly lit parking lot definitely hurts more than landing on canvas in the ring, but it is your job as a competitor to prevent such events.
Paul,
DeleteThat's interesting about bare knuckle because of course I always assumed it was dangerous. And Herschel must have been in the gym full time. I will take your word for it, but there must be a point of diminishing returns. When is fitness a fetish?
I just read a fun book about the Golden age of NY Baseball from 1947-1957, titled “The Era by Roger Kahn,” who was a young sports writer at the time. If those guys spent any time in the gym, he doesn't mention it. They certainly shortened their careers with the time they spent in the bar.
I'm convinced that a lot of golfers like Tiger Woods and Rory Mcllroy screwed up their games in the gym. Both played their greatest golf when they were skinny 23-year-olds.
Neil
Neil,
DeleteHerschel Walker was anything but a gym rat and was famed for his bodyweight workout techniques long before the term "cross training" was coined. In addition to his football regimen, he was a world-class sprinter, became a 5th degree black belt in taekwondo, entered dance competitions with his sister, and even performed in a ballet. The only time he lifted weights was when a team demanded it so a trainer could check off some boxes on a chart. If someone lifts weights so they can show off their huge biceps, that could indeed be a fetish, but Walker's effort seem strictly based in his pursuit of excellence.
There is a point of diminishing returns, but my guess is in football--and in everyday life--one hits that point much more quickly with gym/weight workouts rather than with active bodyweight workouts. Physical debilitation was a major reason Hemingway and Thompson shot themselves when they did; if they had a daily fitness regimen they could follow wherever they went, and if it combined honing the mind and the body, they may have persevered. It is tragic to think of the great unwritten books they probably took to their graves with them.
Baseball--and maybe darts--seem to be about the only sports where players believe they can excel through more time in bars and less time in gyms. And on that point I have to disagree with you about Tiger Woods: he followed a legendary workout program during his reign as one of the greatest golfers in history; it was when he gave into the temptations that befall a man who is young, rich and famous that his game fell apart. I would make the case that his career would have benefitted greatly if he had continued to spend his time in various weight rooms as he traveled, rather than what was apparently an expansive list of bedrooms.
Paul,
DeleteI concede on all points except maybe Tiger. He won the Masters in 1997 by an unheard of 12 strokes over the best in the world. He was a skinny 21-year-old.
Neil
Neil, this discussion of whether Tiger Woods was a young man of “legendary workouts” or just a “skinny 21-year-old” has roused my interest. I found a May 3, 2020, statement from him, as reported on Golf Channel:
DeleteIn his early years on the PGA Tour, Woods' daily workout routines including a heavy running workload, which Woods said took a serious toll on his body. “Running over 30 miles a week for probably my first five, six years on Tour pretty much destroyed my body and my knees.”
His own account of his early conditioning regimen is discouraging, but it does seem to substantiate that he wasn't just a skinny kid.
Morris, so, the weekend in April of 1997 when he was the most amazing 21-year-old golfer in the history of the game, at least since Young Tom Morris, he may have just been starting that running program. Interesting that he feels running shortened his career.
DeleteIf you look at his career on Wiki, you see how incredible he was. In 1996, at age 20, he won his 3rd straight US Amateur title, something not even achieved by the great Bobby Jones. That means he won 18 consecutive matches against the best amateurs. A minor footnote in his record. The Amateur is on this weekend, it’s a grueling test over a week. One poor game and you’re out.
Of course if you play golf every day, you walk 35 miles a week and with another 2 or 3 hours of practice would maintain a fair level of fitness.
Neil
I asked one of my golfing friends about how Tiger was so successful. His comment was that Tiger worked on developing his body’s strength and endurance, in addition to practice. His major impact on golf was to make others recognize that year around disciplined strength and endurance development, not just playing a lot of golf, was the new direction to being in the winner’s circle. He changed professional golf at fundamental level.
DeleteChip,
DeleteThat is the conventional wisdom, sold by the gym gurus, but as a life-long golfer I don't agree. Tiger was never better than he was as a lythe and lean and flexible 21-year-old. Timing and tempo are more critical to a successful golf swing than big muscles, which can actually interfere. Swinging a 40" stick with a chunk of metal at the end to hit a little ball 200 yards, within a few feet of the target, under changing conditions, with some degree of consistency, depends on a level of coordination between intention and execution which is beyond conscious management. Tiger was better at that at 21 then anyone we are likely to see again.
Neil
Fellas,
ReplyDeleteHere's a woman's take on physical fitness in the years when we grew up:
Girls had little opportunity to participate in popular athletics, although we did have some softball, volley ball teams and "tumbling," etc. in gym. But our efforts were rarely funded or respected at the level of boys' sports. Our dads did not take us out to learn tennis or golf, as I remember.
But all of us remember "recess,"--- that antiquated daily tradition of going outside and actually (or maybe) moving around for a time. Because of increased testing requirements and other now-seen-as necessary courses, recess has been dropped at many elementary schools.
But then again, these increased requirements come from the movement for more "accountability" in schools. When a grumpy colleague of mine lamented that kids today know so little about the Greeks and Romans, we had to admit that our knowledge of history ended at the Korean War. That's where our textbooks stopped. We had time for the classics. A lot of history has happened since then, so things like recess have had to move over for more academic teaching time.
BTW, we girls also played Hopscotch and Jump Rope almost daily. Actually, jumping rope "Double Dutch" is intricate and difficult, as the Durham, NC champions have shown.
Cynthia
Cynthia, apparently the ancient Romans didn't know all that much about the ancient Greeks either, because as I recall they muchly duplicated the Greeks' mistakes on the way to their own demise.
DeleteWill historians someday look back on the movement to abandon recess as the ending of fit America, and the beginning of fat America? If children aren't indoctrinated to fitness as a way of life, very few will learn it as adults.
Jumping rope is a daily part of boxing training, but how anyone masters "Double Dutch" and even more intricate routines is beyond my comprehension. I used to live near Durham and saw the "Bouncing Bulldogs" in action; just about everything they did was beyond my comprehension. I saw a jump rope team in Kenya that might give them a challenge, but other than that they seemed at a level above.
Cynthia,
DeleteYour observations are good and to the point. Mine is that kids no longer get to play all day with other kids, unsupervised, as we did. No pick up baseball or basketball, jump rope or bicycle riding. Everything is supervised and organized. Which results in a lot of standing around or sitting in front of the screen so that parents can get something done. I remember in 7th and 8th grade going to the unheated church hall after school to play basketball every day. Nearly frozen fingers. Nancy remembers, as do we all, running around all day with her friends. How much of that happens today? That's why kids are overweight.
Neil
My fitness:
ReplyDeleteStep 1. Got polio at age 7. Got sand kicked in my face for the rest of my childhood, try as I might for revenge.
Step 2. Joined the University Hiking Club, started bagging peaks. Tried to make stubbornness a substitute for strength. It worked, a little.
Step 3. Sterted hanging with Gerry Roach, a notorious hard man. (See "Seven Summits"). He encouraged me to do the Canadian Air Force Aerobics. After a month, two miles on the jeep road behind my cabin. Four months, finished a 15k. 18 months, the Pikes Peak Marathon, in 200th place. Started climbing seriously, cursing the wasted years.
Step 4. Knee trouble by my 40's. Each time I rebuilt after tendonitis, I lost a step. By 60 I had to walk, and my gut ballooned. Now 77, I'm 25 pounds over climbing weight. Still walking five miles in the hills regularly, but even that is tiring.
AGE SUCKS. But consider the alternative.
Chuck, your development as a runner was meteoric! I’ve followed the careers of many runners and I’ve never seen numbers like that. You were a natural! It took me six years to become fast enough to qualify for the Boston Marathon: I don’t think I ever felt fit enough to tackle Pike’s Peak. If you had stayed with running, instead of being lured away by the dirt bag climbing community, Karl Meltzer, Larry Macon and Ricardo Abad might be chasing your records. Five miles/day at your age is pretty amazing too. The only person I’ve known who could match that was my uncle Carl, who I’ve mentioned often on this blog. He was still doing five mile rambles in the woods in his late 80s; I wish you the same good fortune.
DeleteYes, age sucks. All my life, I’ve been skeptical of the American obsession with quantity of life over quality of life. Now that I am 65, I still don’t get it.
Remembering that Americans typically “want it all,” I have to question whether America really has the obsession you say. One piece of evidence does support your contention, though: the many cases of cancer patients who opt for chemotherapy, with that choice’s consequence of huge suffering with frequently little gain of time, rather than focusing on enjoying their remaining time as much as possible, perhaps eventually with the aid of painkillers to alleviate the pain of the cancer itself (palliative care).
DeleteMoristotle, your comment strikes me due to a family situation: an octogenarian in-law battling his third or fourth type of cancer in the past 15 years, who has been told this cancer is inoperable, and who--after many previous rounds of chemotherapy--has opted out in favor of a "home remedy" cancer effort. Don't know if anyone else has heard this, but a doctor at Johns Hopkins did a study and found dog de-wormer safe for human use, and reportedly effective against certain types of cancer. So far the dog de-wormer is proving more effective at holding the cancer at bay than was the chemo, and with none of the debilitating side effects. There are still many other health issues to deal with--almost inevitably, it seems, at that age--so I stand by my opinion: Americans would be far better served to take better care of themselves and max out their quality of life before they age, instead of dwelling on how to extend the quantity of life after the quality is mostly gone.
DeletePaul, true what you say! “Americans would be far better served to take better care of themselves and max out their quality of life before they age, instead of dwelling on how to extend the quantity of life after the quality is mostly gone.“
DeleteNeil, your comment about the rare obese kid being the "source of cruel amusement 70 years ago" is exactly my concern for my son and other (rare) fit kids like him. In America today, the masses seem to be in awe of those who are fat and loud rather than those who are fit and intelligent, so I have to wonder if the rare fit kid will be the source of cruel amusement 10 years from now. America is the sort of place where I could imagine the pendulum continuing to swing away from shaming those who are fat, to instead shaming those who are fit.
ReplyDeletePaul,
DeleteI agree that fat people are less abused and discriminated against nowadays but fitness is still in fashion and admired. Always has been in Western culture. At least since the Greeks. I don't see that changing. I would not worry about your son being ostracized.
Neil
And Caelen will be much better able to deal with hecklers than a pudgy weakling is....And, having read his father’s “Stories for My Son,” he will have an inspirational model for not suffering abuse.
DeleteMoristotle, hopefully my son does not blow out his left knee at age 14, like his dad did. But if he does, and if he has a kindly tutor to teach him how to break bricks with his bare hands--as I did when I spent months on crutches with not much else to do--he probably won't have to suffer abuse for his fitness. If you are small, you tend to attract bullies, but when they learn you have a punch that can break a brick, they generally leave you alone.
DeletePaul, Thanks for the compliment. Means a lot to a frustrated athlete. I didn't actually have talent as a runner. In fact, congenital duck-footedness guaranteed that I'd never be fast, and the eventual tendonitis was inevitable. What I had was an ability to grit my teeth and grind it out (a common trait in polio survivors, I'm told). That and living at 8500'. I actually beat the American Women's record holder to the summit of Pikes, and it wasn't through talent. The poor lady lived in Orange, California, elevation 100'. She didn't have a prayer against any mountaineer.
ReplyDeleteChuck, since you lived and trained at 8500 elevation, they should have made you carry extra weight to even the odds--like they do with race horses. Thirty years later, I sometimes wonder if I'm still trying to get my breathing back to normal from my first high-elevation mountain bike race; it was a dreadful experience.
ReplyDeleteOut of curiosity: Was that by any chance Julie Brown you outdueled at Pike's Peak. If so, "I Outran Julie Brown" should be at the top of your resume, and maybe etched in stone when the time comes.
Paul, as I started to read your sentence, “If so, ‘I Outran...” seemed to me to be going to be a Side Story suggestion!
DeleteI think it was Joan Benoit. The winning woman that year 1978) was Donna Messanger. I find it perfectly plausible that Benoit didn't win, as she showed up for altitude training just a few days before the race.
DeleteChuck, wow! Benoit is an even bigger name than Brown, won the first Olympic marathon for women, if I recall correctly. "I Outran Joan Benoit" is definite resume/epitaph material.
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