By James Knudsen
Whose idea was it to put the fourth Saturday on the 22nd?
Whose idea was it to fill this week with all manner of things to run around attempting to accomplish in July San Joaquin Valley heat?
Whose idea was it to have a scatter-brained, unemployed actor contribute one column a month? It happened so long ago that I’m not sure who should receive the credit... or blame.
I do recall that it was shortly after a mini-reunion at Jim Rix’s place in South Lake Tahoe that Morris approached me about writing something, and it seemed like something that was within my capabilities. The Fourth Saturday was born, along with the now retired sobriquet, “Loneliest Liberal.”
Morris, you have been a patient, understanding editor who has been willing to accept “pieces” that often have the vaguest of rhyme, and the reason for which remains a mystery. Most of all, you have provided a link to another Morris, the value of which link cannot be quantified.
Dad often spoke of the classes from Tulare High and the five-year rule. He found that at an interval of about five years, a very special class would come through. Your class of 1960 may well rank at the top of that select group.
This still doesn’t feel like a Fourth Saturday, so I leave you and my devoted fans – both of them – with the top ten things the “Acting Citizen” will do in lieu of writing a column for the Moristotle & Co. blog:
#10 – Write snarky letters to the loudmouth at the VIP table at Mar-A-Lago.
#9 – Write decidedly NOT snarky letters to casting agents.
#8 – Use the extra time to properly sort laundry prior to washing. Currently it’s “washables” and “things that in a perfect world would be dry-cleaned.”
#7 – Write a “serious” letter, cc’d to every member of the “Freedom Caucus,” demanding that they form a special committee to investigate, and determine once and for all, “Who shot J.R.?”
#6 – Create lesson plans, because I finally have a full-time job, and it’s daunting.
#5 – Watch the “House of Representatives, Special Committee hearings investigating the shooting of J.R. Ewing.” (You know they’re going to do it!)
#4 – Buy a portable P.A. system and stand on the corner extolling the virtues of front-wheel drive.
#3 – Run for Congress. I probably won’t, but it might be worth it just to poke at Kevin McCarthy.
#2 – Hire a polling firm to determine if I should keep the beard.
#1 – Remember to be grateful for every day I get to spend on this chunk of rock, hurtling through space, in the presence of gifted people, like the ones I have shared space with as a Moristotelian. Thank you.
Well, I guess you must have three fans, not two, as I will miss this column. I can't weigh in about the beard, as I haven't seen it. The photo looks very nice without it. I will watch with interest Congress' J.R. hearings, if I haven't been locked up by then with the rest of my subculture. Alas, I live in the wrong California county to vote for you for Congress, but I will definitely donate to the campaign!
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