Fish for Friday

Limerick of the Week:

It was such fun before to run some jokes,
We thought we'd try again with different strokes:
    This time we'll vent
    Two jokes we're sent
About two little good old lady folks.

I will have to think of something clever like this for my four husbands, ha!:

A local radio station was interviewing an 80-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband's occupation.
    "He's a funeral director," she said.
    The newsman thought this was interesting....
    He asked her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living. She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years. After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she had first married a banker when she was in her 20's, then a circus ringmaster when in her 40's, a preacher when in her 60's, and now—in her 80's—a funeral director.
    The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers.
    The dear old newlywed smiled and explained, "I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go."

My driver's license expired, but I've been too sick today to go to the DMV. I look so old, the following story reminded me of the reason I tell them my age, so they don't think I'm older than I am:

My neighbor was working in his yard when he was startled by a late model car that came crashing through his hedge and ended up on his front lawn. He rushed to help the very old-looking lady behind the wheel get out of the car and sit down on a lawn chair.
    Carefully he said, "Aren't you a little...old to be driving?"
    "Well, yes, I am," she replied proudly. "I'll be 97 next month, and I am now old enough that I don't even need a driver's license anymore."
    My neighbor couldn't believe it. "How can that be?" he asked the old lady.
    "The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I had a driver's license. I told him I did and handed it to him. He took some scissors out of a drawer, cut the license into pieces, and threw them in the waste basket. And he said, 'You won't be needing this anymore!'"

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Copyright © 2013 by Morris Dean

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